Good enough for whom? I'm not sure. Probably my own standards but there was an incessant chatter in my mind, a little voice that kept saying "You are letting down everyone you love. Do more."
How long can you live with those expectations before you break down? Not long.
I finally realized that doing more was NOT the answer. The answer was less. I decided to make a list of things I wanted to simplify.
Besides focusing on paying off bills, decluttering and living with less material possessions (Less clothing doesn't just mean less shopping but also less laundry and less time deciding what to wear. And what do all those things mean? More time.), I really wanted to simplify my diet and exercise routine. With Lu starting to eat solids, I knew I needed to figure out how to transition from time-consuming recipes to more nutritious and easier meals. I also wanted to incorporate regular exercise into my day. I knew it would give me more energy and that it needed to become a habit. So, I decided to start Beachbody's 21-Day Fix (more on this later) on 8/11.
Now, remember how I said I had this voice telling me I was failing? And I phrased the experience in past tense? I should have used present. I still feel that way.
Yoga is one of my great loves, so I've had many people tell me that I should try meditation to calm myself and clear my mind. But I've always laughed it off - my mind? It is going a mile a minute, all day, every single day. Meditation is not for someone like me. My mind could never be clear!
Tonight, reading Buzzfeed (yes, I know, waste of time!), I came across a piece about meditation where Deepak Chopra answers questions about the practice (http://www.buzzfeed.com/whitneyjefferson/deepak-chopra-answers-questions-about-meditation?s=mobile). Halfway through, I came across this:
Wow. That's me.
The piece was connected to promotion for a 21-day meditation program that starts on (get this...) 8/11.
If that's not a sign that this is something I need to try to incorporate into my simplification journey, I don't know what is.
Have you tried meditation? Any advice?